


Always Running Away

by loricameback



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Has Issues, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Confusion, Conspiracy, Everyone Has Issues, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Hurt Steve Rogers, I Don't Even Know, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Protective Steve Rogers, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Tags Are Hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-09-25 03:07:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17113274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loricameback/pseuds/loricameback
Summary: Rachel Sinclair is at her all-time low.  Recently divorced,  she's gotten laid-off and if she doesn't find a job soon will lose her Manhattan apartment.Thanks to her overactive imagination her life is about to get turned upside-down.Or...what happens when you punch Sebastian Stan in the face,  get your job back working for Bucky, and end up in a hellova dangerous situation that might get you killed





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Additional tags will probably be added to each chapter as I'm still not used to this. Bare with me and enjoy!

This was not how life was supposed to be for me. At 32, I’m divorced, jobless, and pretty soon won’t be able to afford the rent in my Manhattan apartment I live in. 

Sitting at the kitchen table eating my ramen noodle dinner for the third time this week…I looked through the bills. Overdue, past due, final notice…the more I looked, the sicker I was becoming. 

Stifling a blood-curdling scream, I stood up, splashed water on my face and cleaned up before leaving the house for the park. 

It was dusk. My favorite time to be here.

Since becoming an alcoholic was not an option, and drugs were a DEFINITE no-no, walking was my therapy, plus Central Park was my favorite place to be. Pffft, I might end up living here. My eyes caught the ones of the homeless man’s on the park bench. He was wearing ragged clothes, shoes with holes, but it was his eyes that affected me most. They were exactly like mine: hopeless. I gave him a tight smile and lowered my head before walking passed him. 

I raised my head slightly and pretending to relieve a cramp, turned it halfway to rub my neck and saw the man out of my peripheral vision…again. This was the third time in the past two weeks he was following me. He’s too tall to be Brian. Did he send someone to hurt me?

I internally rolled my eyes. You watch too many movies Rachel! But he was the same guy, I was positive. And I’m by myself. This IS Central Park after all. Damnit Rachel do something!! I balled my hand into a fist, whipped around and punched him in the face. 

Both of us yelled in pain at the same time. I held my hand from the pain while he cupped his bearded jaw. “HOLY SHIT LADY!! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!!”

A couple on their 30s ran up to us…or should I say my “stalker.” I watched them incredulously. “Are you KIDDING me?!”

It was then that I saw who I punched: Sebastian Stan. The three of them were looking at me like I was crazy. I approached him timidly, tilting my head to see his jaw, mouthing “ouch” which he did not find humorous. Looking at the other two, I asked politely if they would leave, to which they looked at Sebastian. He nodded. Did they think I was going to attack him...again? Oh God, what did I just do?

After they left, I noticed the woman occasionally look back. Lord woman, just GO!!

Sebastian looked at me, brows bumped together, eyes narrowed, waiting for an explanation. 

I took a deep breath and frowned. Lord he was gorgeous. Those lips were…I groaned and mumbled to myself, “Not now.”

“What do you mean, ‘not now?’ You hit me!” Anger flashed through his blue eyes. 

I put my hands up in surrender. “No. I was talking to myself. Listen…I’m REALLY sorry! Unfortunately my thoughts got away from me and I could swear I was being stalked.” A nervous laugh escaped my mouth. 

Sebastian wasn’t saying a word. At this point I was on the verge of tears. “Mr Stan, I’m really sorry. Please forgive me.” I couldn’t look at him anymore. The man thinks I’m a freak. I tried walking around him, but he took me by the arm to stop me.

“Hey, did you really think that I was going to hurt you?” Sebastian seemed amused by the situation now. I swallowed hard. Jesus, his smile is beautiful. Luckily there was a bench close by, because my knees were about to give out. I nodded to the bench and he followed.

With a grin he asked, “Since you know I’m not a stalker, may I sit with you?”

Embarrassed, I waved my hand next to me. 

“And please call me Sebastian.”

I nodded. “Rachel.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Ra-chel,” he repeated slowly, then looked at me up and down with a smirk. “Well Rachel, you have quite a right hook.” He winced as he gently touched his jaw. I was getting uncomfortable now. Is he going to press charges? It would be just my luck!

I stood up and spat out “Listen Mr. Stan, if you want to call the police, I’ll just…”

“Wait a minute. Rachel.” His voice was soothing as he looked at me with concern. “I’m not pressing charges. I was just…” he chuckled, “complimenting you.” Sebastian’s entire face was like a ray of sunshine with his smile and sparkling eyes. (RACHEL! Snap out of it!!) “Seriously, do you take self-defense classes or are you just badass?”

I bit back a smile. “No on both counts. Probably just four months of stress building up.” I shrugged. “It actually felt pretty good.”

Sebastian belly laughed, his entire face scrunched up, then he stood up and bowed. “Glad to be at your service Miss Rachel.”

Well I couldn’t help but laugh as well. It was the first time I laughed that day. Hell, that month really. I sighed and looked at him again. Those beautiful eyes, his full beard that he occasionally stroked…which honestly was a little unnerving, and his jaw that could probably cut glass.

I stood up and smiled. “I want to apologize again Sebastian. Maybe I should make one hundred percent sure I’m being stalked before I punch someone.” Looking up at the dark sky, I said, “I’ve got to be getting home. Maybe I’ll see you around.” I turned to walk away and silently hoped he’d call me back. Seriously, it’s Sebastian frickin Stan!

“Rachel!” My inner self was jumping in the air, screaming for joy, and doing cartwheels. But instead I turned with a blank expression, not saying a word. 

Sebastian stood up and walked towards me. “Let me walk you home. I wouldn’t feel right letting you go alone.”

He put his arm around me and said, “And THAT person might not be as forgiving…or as harmless as me.”

“You know I walk here every night.”

“And *you* know that this isn’t the safest place to be at night. Hell, just earlier, some woman punched me!” He pointed to his jaw.

He’s a charmer all right. I looked around suspiciously. “Maybe I should be walking *you* home.” Realizing what I said, I stopped walking, squeezed my eyes shut and groaned. “OK, that’s *not* what I meant!”

Sebastian laughed so hard that he doubled over and he couldn’t catch his breath. 

“Oh my God Sebastian, it wasn’t *that* funny!”

His face was red when he calmed down. After a few breaths, he put a hand on my shoulder and said, “I’m sorry Rachel, but you looked so horrified. I’m sorry but it was hilarious!” 

I looked at him like he was insane,and he tried his best not to laugh, but he stumbled forward, unable to control his laughter. This was humiliating. As if the thought of me going home with him is hilarious to him. Well, it is but still, this is a slap in the face!

“That’s enough! Goodnight Mr Stan!” I pushed him and broke out into a run.

“RACHEL!” He caught up to me easily, grabbing my arm. “What did I say? I’m sorry. Please stop running away.”

My nose itched from the threat of tears about to fall. “Let me go. This is turning out to be a lame fanfic. Just…” I yanked hard and broke away from him, covering my mouth and going home.

As soon as I shut the door behind me, I crumbled to the floor, crying. Burying my face in my hands, I cursed my life. But mostly I cursed Brian. Why did I marry that asshole? Putting me down every chance he got, telling me that I was never good enough, and always laughing at me. 

I stood up, picking up the nearest breakable thing…a vase…and hurled it against the wall, shattering it in pieces. “I FUCKIN HATE YOU!!”

 

I decided to go to the park earlier the next day hoping Sebastian wouldn’t be there. Hell, no man…even Sebastian Stan…is going to keep me from coming here.

There were more people here which helped me take my mind off of things. I could imagine being part of their families. A cute elderly couple strolling over the bridge hand in hand. You couldn’t help but smile at them. Walking slow and somewhat steady, the man looked at his wife lovingly. When will this happen for me? Ok, people watching was a bad idea. 

What I really need is Nat. My best friend and executive assistant that I used to work with at Stark Industries. She kept her job while I got laid off. If anyone knew how to pull me out of a slump, it was her. But she is still at work. So I decided on getting a latte.

The local coffee shop wasn’t too busy so I got a window seat and immediately took out my phone. No job alerts. Pffft, of course not. I shook my head. It has to get better, right? Right??!! Then the door opened and I facepalmed. Tell me that this isn’t happening. 

“Hey there Rachel. Mind if I sit?” But he pulled out the chair and sat before I could say no. “Well that’s not very friendly.” He smirked as he sat back in his chair. “I saw you through the window and wanted to say hi, how ya doin good lookin?”

I rolled my eyes. “Well now that you have, go away,” I said through gritted teeth. 

Brian reached for my hand, a patronizing look on his face. I glared at him, not speaking, watching him look at me with cold eyes and a patronizing smile, knowing full well that he was waiting for me to look away, but I held my ground. “Why couldn’t we work things out Rachel? I love you.”

I growled, “Don’t you *dare* say those words to me. You never loved me. You controlled me. You put me down. You…” He sat back with a smug smile on his face. 

“Rachel! I panicked when I couldn’t find you in the park and forgot we were supposed to meet here. Am I interrupting?”

I was momentarily stunned when I looked up to see Sebastian glaring at Brian. What a dilemma. Sebastian, of all people, standing here. I didn’t want to see him, still humiliated from the other day, but I definitely didn’t want to sit with Brian. 

Brian stood up, cocky and confrontational, and barked, “Beat it pal, I’m talking to my wife.”

“I am NOT your wife anymore Brian! Leave me alone!!” I stormed out of the door, but not before I heard Brian threaten Sebastian again. Damnit, I’m not dealing with them. 

“RACHEL WAIT!” Sebastian slid to a stop in front of me. Well, I guess if one of them were to chase after me, I’d rather it be Sebastian than Brian. “Why are you always running away?” He ran his fingers through his hair, looking at me intently, waiting for an answer. Why does he make me so nervous?

“Thanks for getting me out of there Sebastian.” I wanted to cry. “What do you want?”

He said nothing. Just looked at me. After a few seconds, he threw his arms up incredulously and took a step back.

“Nothing?” I raised my eyebrows, impatient. “Ok then, see you around.” I wondered as I walked away if he’d call me back or follow. I rubbed my forehead as I walked, groaning quietly.


	2. Chapter 2

And here I was, back at the kitchen table, glaring at the bills that were taunting me: we’re not going away Rachel. Pay…*pulling out sword*…or die!

“FUCK YOU…AND BRIAN!!” Walking to the fridge to get a bottle of water, I growled as an afterthought, “and Sebastian Stan.” Shuffling to the couch I thought, why would I be mad at him though? Should I expect him to keep following me like a puppy? Pffft, if I were him, I would’ve walked away after I hit him. He got me out of a terrible situation, and I was rude to him. 

“God, why am I such a fuck up?” I buried my face in my hands and cried. After calming down, I grabbed my phone,scrolled down to Nat and texted her. 

//Got a minute?// As I waited, I looked at the picture of our boss Sam, Nat, and me at the office Christmas party last night, drinks in hand. Sam was telling us one of his famous dirty jokes and the office manager Steve had taken the picture at the perfect time as it showed my spittake landing right in Nat’s face. It never failed to make me smile.

//Yeah, what’s up//

I grit my teeth as I typed. //Saw shithead today//

//😩😡What now?//

//I was in the coffee shop. He stopped in to make my life hell//

I dropped my head. Well I sure as he’ll am not telling her about Sebastian. That woman would never let up on the subject…Oh my God! You’re so lucky! Isn’t he hot! Did he kick Brian’s ass? Did you make out with him…I rolled my eyes. 

//The manager threw him out//

//😩I’m sorry Rachel. You know I never liked him//

//I don’t need an I told you so right now Nat! My life is shit, ok?!//

//Sweetie, I’m sorry, but I DO have great news for you! Meet me at the Scarlett Falcon tonight. About 10? It’s on me//

I grit my teeth as I typed. //When isn’t it?//

//Stop gritting your teeth and meet me//

I couldn’t help but smile. 

 

Water. Today I remembered the water. Summer was coming to an end and the days were getting shorter. Fall was pretty but I was not fond of the chill. Winter in New York City was absolutely gorgeous but I despised the cold weather. If you ever wanted to meet the ultimate pessimist, come out and hang out with me! Summer is my absolute favorite season. I can live through the humidity, but the damn air conditioner is always making this loud ticking noise on the high setting and it drives me crazy! 

And my only place…my ONLY happy place…is now ruined because of Sebastian Stan. But I’m not leaving. 

Today was perfect for walking. But not for what was up ahead. “You’ve GOT to be kidding me!” There HE stood with 3 girls taking pictures and signing autographs. Is he ALWAYS here?!! 

Quickly I turned and shuffled off before he could see me. 

“Rachel!!”

My shoulders drooped and I sighed, defeated. Sinkhole…where are you??? I turned, a forced smile on my face. 

“Are you following me?” He joked with a smirk as he nudged me with his elbow, chuckling.

“Ya know, there are people who think finding Big Foot would be easier than finding you.” My sarcasm was dripping, then I closed my eyes, shaking my head. “I’m sorry. And I apologize for earlier. You got me out of a really difficult spot and I appreciate it. So uh, thanks again and I’ll see you around,” I chuckled uncomfortably. “Probably.” I walked passed him, noticing the girls who were fawning over the pictures on their phones. Yeah ladies, he’s hot, he’s nice, but face it…he’s a man. They’re all the same. 

“Why are you so bitter Rachel? Is it your ex?” He was right behind me. 

I turned, irritated. “It’s none of your business. I didn’t ask you to get involved Sebastian.” I looked around, getting more frustrated by the second. “I could’ve handled it myself!” My anger took hold of me so much that I threw the water bottle and ran my hands through my hair and I stormed away.

He called out, “Didn’t seem like it!!”

I stopped cold and grit my teeth. My dentist is really gonna love me. I turned, the look on my face would shoot daggers through his head. Why are men such assholes. I walked back slowly and tried to stay calm. “MR. Stan. You don’t know a damn thing about me. Why do you even bother? Look,” I nodded towards the girls who were smiling at him. “You have women…and men for that matter…who would love to be with you. I, on the other hand, am annoyed by you.” Tears were forming which I hated. It made me feel and look weak. “Would you please leave me alone!”

“STOP!” His voice was commanding which got my attention. More soothingly, he repeated, “Stop,” as he put his hands on my shoulders. “You punch me. Apologize. Run away. Come back. You thank me, then you yell at me.” He twist his lips, hesitating, then continued. “Do you have a..." "therapist you could talk to maybe?" 

My lip quivered as I glared at him. “How dare you!” I yanked back my right shoulder, turned on my heel and walked away. 

 

I paid the taxi driver and walked through the door of the Scarlett Falcon with the intent of getting drunk and forgetting that annoying man existed. Nat waved from the bar looking gorgeous as always. Her red hair contrasted well with the black leather jacket. Black jeans that looked painted on had every guy salivating. Needless to say, Nat hardly spends any money when we go to a bar. Once a man got a little handsy, thinking that she owed him something in return. Bad idea.

Nat was special forces in the army about 5 years ago. She warned him once to remove his hand from her waist. When he didn’t, she grabbed his arm, twist it behind his back and slammed his face on the bar. Needless to say, I feel pretty safe with Nat.

I pulled up the stool next to her and motioned the bartender for a beer. “Jesus Nat, how do you breathe in those jeans?”

She smirked. “This isn’t painful. Paying for drinks is painful.”

The bartender placed the drink in front of me as Nat slipped him the money. Inside I was screaming, but mumbled “thanks.”

“Don’t frown at me chickie. Maybe next week we can celebrate.” Her coy smile intrigued me. “TJ quit and Barnes needs a new assistant. Sam already put in a good word.”

I stared at her, dumbfounded. James Barnes? Every woman wanted to sleep with that man. I’ll admit that yes, he is attractive, but he is an asshole. His mood swings are worse than a roomful of premenstrual women.

“Why did TJ quit?”

“He and the hubbs moved, I don’t know…out of state somewhere.” She spun her chair in my direction. “Rachel! The job is yours if you want it.” She took me by the arms. “We won’t be in the same office this time, but you’re right down the hall.”

I wanted to be excited, really I did, but nothing goes my way. Barnes will take one look at me and kick me out of his office. 

“Why aren’t you happy? You’re back to work. And with the gang!” Just then a tall, hot guy in a suit broke in. “Excuse me ladies…”

“Go away.” Nat didn’t even look at him. Just waved him off. His confidence was shot to hell in an instant as he walked away. “You have nothing to lose Rachel. Be at the office at nine. What do you have to lose?”

I downed the rest of my beer. God, I hate when she’s right.

 

MONDAY 8:45

The elevator opened on the 23rd floor of Stark Industries. Nothing had changed.

To the right was Peggy’s office with her assistant Wanda. Straight ahead…office manager Steve with assistant Clint. The main receptionist Bruce to the extreme left, and Sam and Nat around the corner from Bruce’s desk.

“HI RACHEL! WELCOME BACK!!” Steve shouted from across the room. I waved and smiled, my entire body tensing up as all eyes were on me then a parade of people came at me. I looked at Steve with narrowed eyes, but he knew it was good natured. 

“DID I HEAR RACHEL WAS IN DA HOUSE?!!” Sam rushed up behind me, lift me bride style and spun me.

“PUT ME DOWN YOU ANIMAL!” I slapped his arm as I laughed. 

I was back on my feet and he shrugged. “What? I missed you girl.”

I smoothed my skirt down and readjusted my blouse, making sure that I was presentable. I scanned the room and said, “Damn, it’s so good to see you all but,” I motioned behind me with my thumb. “I have an appointment.” I walked down the hall slowly as if I were going to the electric chair. With his brooding demeanor, Mr Barnes is going to be a challenging working with, unlike Sam, who is polar opposites to the man.

I reached his outer office and his secretary wasn’t here. The clock read 8:58 and I wasn’t about to be late because of a missing secretary. As I raised my arm to knock, the door swung open and smacked me hard in the face.

“WHAT THE HELL?!” I cupped my cheek and glared at the angry James Barnes.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've added more tags to this chapter. They might not pertain to THIS one per se, as I have 11 chapters already written. I still might be adding more tags as I go...who knows. Hope you guys are liking it so far. This is gonna get crazier as we go!

Mr Barnes glared at me as I stood there in pain. "Where have you been?!" He demanded. Seriously? The man slams me with the door and not only does he not apologize, he *yells* at me! Conjuring up as much grace as I could, I said, "Mr Barnes, I am not late for my appointment. As you might know, I was previously employed here, and the staff was welcoming me back. Lifting my head high and maintaining steady eye contact, I continued, "although if I'm going to be berated for being on time and," I made it a point to wince when I touched my cheek, "be screamed at when I get in the way of your door..."

He didn't say anything. Just looked at me as if I was speaking a different language. 

I rolled my eyes. "Well then, this apparently is NOT going to work. Good day Mr Barnes." With one more evil glare, I turned and left. 

Still fuming when I reached the reception area, Nat had come out of her office, eyes wide. "What's all the shouting about?"

I shook my head, looking behind me to see if he was there. "It doesn't matter Nat. I can't work with him." Walking to her office, I peeked in and said goodbye to Sam, but he was on the phone. He looked up and I waved goodbye. 

"Mackie! I'll call you back!" He rushed around his desk and had his arms out. "Hey now, wher' you goin?"

I smiled softly. "Sam, you are truly the best. Thank you so much for thinking about me. But if I have to work with that bastard..." my nostrils flared. Taking a deep breath, I continued, "It's just not going to work Sam." I side-eyed Nat with a grin. "But if you ever come to your senses and fire Nat..."

"WHERE DID SHE GO?!! SHE LEFT?! WHAT THE..." James was irate as he stormed down the hall. When I walked into his path, he stopped short, giving me a once over. "Why the hell did you walk out? Isn't this your first day Ms. Sinclair?"

I clenched my jaw and my body stiffened. "Mr Barnes, you are one cocky son of a bitch. I was here ON TIME. You smacked me with your door and didn't even apologize. And don't speak to me as if I'm your employee. I work FOR Mr Stark. I work WITH you. AND if I go back in that office, I demand respect..." I stepped closer and grit my teeth, "and a fuckin apology." I held his stare, hoping I wouldn't cave. Honestly I had no idea how I had the courage to say all of that to the infamous James Barnes.

The entire outer office was completely silent. Neither of us backed down, but I prayed that either Nat or Sam would tell everyone to get back to work. But I did here Sam mumble to Nat, "Call Stark." Wonderful. My second first day and the boss is involved.

Barnes sneered, "So we need Tony to straighten you out. Fine." He did a once over, shook his head and walked back to his office. I stood there motionless and astounded.

Nat came back out, her hand on her forehead and sighed in frustration. "Stark's in a meeting and..." she looked at Sam as if Bruce had turned into a green monster and handed him the message. After he read it, his eyes bugged out. Sam looked at Nat in practically the same fashion. "Are you KIDDING me?"

Nat threw up her hands, turned to go to her office and mumbled something that sounded like, "I don't know what goes on in this place anymore. Next Stark's gonna have us dressed up as superheroes taking on some shithead from another planet with an alien army."

Sam put his hand on my shoulder gently and said, "Just sit...wait. You want a drink?" I looked towards the kitchen, but before I could say anything, he turned me towards his office and opened the door. "No, girl."

I looked at him, my brows furrowed in confusion. Sam directed me to the couch where Nat was still talking to herself. "Black leather catsuit would look cool." I moved my head back, narrowed my eyes at her, then looked back at Sam. He walked in and poured a drink. Scotch.

He nodded, twisting his lips. "I know, you're a beer girl. But hun, you're gonna need this."

"Nat." She didn't move. "NATALIA!" Nothing. He looked back at me and pointed to the glass. "Drink." He left.

I sipped it and coughed hysterically. "Oh fuck no!" I put the glass down and turned my attention on Nat. "What is going on? You're my best friend and you're not going to tell me anything?"

The vacant look in her eyes didn't change when she looked up at me. "I'm not allowed." She now looked apologetic. "You're not in trouble babe, I promise. But you know Tony. Stark Industries and everything concerning him is confidential."

I rolled my eyes. "So when do I find out about this *air quote* big secret?"

Nat shrugged. "Soon I guess."

 

SOON I GUESS (1 HOUR LATER)

 

I spent my time catching up with everyone. I figured that if I'm not coming back, I'd like to see them one last time. 

I started with Bruce. His back was turned but I noticed that he was taking some pills. When he drank his water, he noticed me standing close by, and waved me over. After he put his glass down, he stood up and hugged me. "Hey kiddo, how ya doin?"

I furrowed my brows. *I'm* good. You?"

He shrugged and attempted a half hearted smile. "You know this place. So stressful, the assholes that call here and come in. Everyone takes there shit out on me before they speak to the higher-ups." He lowered his head, squeezing his eyes shut, then looked back up at me. "Some guy named Sitwell or something kept demanding to see Stark and..." Bruce started shaking so I put my hand on his shoulder to calm him. "Anyway, Tony made me go to an anger management class and now..." He held up the pill bottle and smiled sarcastically.

"Wow. I'm sorry."

"Well, it was inevitable. The pills help though." 

Next was Peggy. Peggy was beautiful and smart as a whip. She was in the army which I really admired her for. The last time I saw her, she had a crush on Steve, but nothing ever came of it.

"Why Peggy?" I asked enthusiastically then scrunched my nose. "Is it because of Barnes? Aw c'mon Peg! That was a fling. Steve really likes you. What's changed?"

She frowned as she looked in the direction of Steve's office. "They were making out in the kitchen."

My eyes widened. "NOOOOOO!" I took her hands, squeezing them. Yet *another* reason to hate Barnes. "How long ago was this?"

She shrugged as a tear fell. "A year."

"Aw hun, it might have been a one-time thing. It was a *year* ago." I stood up and looked towards Steve's office then back at Peggy. "BARNES?!!" I walked over to hug her. 

Next was Clint. He had a slew of paperwork on his desk, but was looking through an archery magazine, unaware that I was leaning on the door frame. I sighed. "Good to know your priorities haven't changed."

Clint dropped the magazine and jumped up. "RACH!!" Clint picked me up and gave me a bear hug, squeezing the life out of me. 

I could barely squeak out, "OK, OK, put me down." Nat snuck in behind me and whispered, "Barnes office. Now." She left as quickly as she came in. Clint let out a low whistle. "Damn that woman is hot."

I glared at him. "Aren't you married?"

"Hey, I'm not touchin. I'm lookin. Lookin hard."

I sighed as I left his office. "Men are pigs."

I walked over to Nat and Sam first. Sam ordered, "Go...now!!" I was shocked. Sam never talked to me like that. What the fuck am I walking in to? I knocked on the door, entered the office with Tony, Barnes, and, "ARE YOU FUCKIN KIDDING ME?!!!"

Sebastian Stan himself standing behind Barnes. 

He was as shocked to see me as I was him. I looked at Tony to Sebastian back to Tony. 

Tony spoke first. "Rachel, you apparently know Mr Stan?"

I winced. "We've met, yes sir."

He looked at me warily. "Mmmhmm."

Sebastian was still confused. "You? Why?" He looked at Barnes. "Bucky, what's going on?"

 

I bit back a laugh, but it came out anyway. "Bucky?" I covered my mouth. Nobody found it humorous but me. I turned around and heard a mechanical noise. What the...

Barnes's fist. Was that metal? A metal hand? What the flying fuck?!! How in the hell did I not notice that before?!! He was sneering, obviously agitated. Sebastian was speaking to him quietly, rubbing his shoulders, trying to calm him.

Tony pointed to a chair. "Sit and be quiet."

Sure thing boss. Just make the nice man stop doing things with his hand, k?

Tony began. "Apparently we have a problem." I broke in politely. 

"Sir, I'm sorry. One question, then fire me, do whatever you want, but.." I looked at Sebastian curiously. "Why is Mr Stan here?"

"I'm his brother Rachel." Sebastian gave me a stern look that made me feel like a little kid in trouble with her mother.

I stared at him for a very long three seconds then nodded slowly trying to take in this outrageous new information without falling out of my chair. Well this is just great. If I work here I have to deal with Barnes attitude AND knowing that Sebastian could pop in from time to time. "OK." I replied hesitantly.

Tony continued with his usual cocky tone, "If I may...oh wait! I'm the BOSS! I just WILL kids." It took every ounce of self-control not to roll my eyes. "Rachel, apparently you were berating Mr Barnes..."

I stood up, irate, "NOW WAIT A MINUTE!!"

Tony pointed to the chair...his eyes aflame, his lips twisted in anger. ""SIT.DOWN!!" 

I heard Sebastian murmur sarcastically, "Typical," and Barnes was motionless, almost...emotionless. As if he were in a trance. At the moment I was really pissed at Sebastian. Sure, Tony and Barnes have reasons to be angry, but I was nice to Sebastian...mostly.

"Rachel, you'll have your turn." Tony walked to the window, hands clasped behind his back and continued, "Rachel, you were offered a job working for Mr Barnes." I grit my teeth. *With* asshole." On your first day you were late and you immediately argued with him concerning the matter and left." He turned to look at Barnes. "Is this correct Barnes?"

He glared at me and replied, "That is right."

"Would you like to add anything?"

Barnes looked at me with the same smirk as his brother. Damn! Shave off Sebastian's beard and they could be twins. Or are they? "Yes I would." Sebastian, hands on the back of his brother's chair, looked at me with...regret? as James spoke. "Ms Sinclair stated that I hit her with the door...which I did not."

I opened my mouth in disbelief and balled my hands in fists. Son of a bitch!

Angry Tony, Barnes and a seemingly now regretful Sebastian were all looking at me. "Oh, my turn now?" Sweet sarcasm was dripping. "Fuck this place and especially you and your lies Bucky boy!!" I got up, stormed out and slammed the door, hearing something fall and break. Good!

The door opened and Sebastian called out for me. I turned but kept walking, pointing at him, spitting my words. "DON'T!! YOU CAN'T COME IN HERE, SMIRKING LIKE YOUR ASSHOLE BROTHER, THEN LOOK LIKE YOU WANT TO RESCUE ME! WHY DO YOU SHOW UP EVERYFUCKINWHERE I AM?!! LEAVE ME ALONE!!"

Not only was everyone looking, they were aghast that Sebastian Stan...yes, *the* Sebastian Stan, was not only in the office, but was getting his ass chewed out by an apparent crazy employee.

Nat grabbed me from behind, scaring the shit out of me, and my anger got directed to her. "And YOU! YOU knew about this?!!"

She tried to stay calm, smiling uncomfortably. "Rach, in what alternate universe would I think you knew Sebastian frickin Stan?" As an afterthought, she asked, "And why didn't you tell me?" She looked at him behind me, giving him one of her best flirtatious smiles.

I sent daggers towards her. "AAAHHH!!" I tore away from her, not paying attention to the excited office, I headed towards the elevator and slammed the button. Of course he was right behind me, reaching for my arm.

"You remember my right hook don't you?" I paused for effect. "Go back to your brother so he can make up some more lies. And then introduce yourself to Nat," who of course was watching every second of our altercation, "my former best friend." I sneered at her as she tilt her head at me, pouting. "*She's* got a thing for you."

He touched my arm and I flinched so he pulled back, putting his hands up in surrender. "Rachel," his voice was soft. "I had no idea it was you. Although, why not? We seem to run in to each other everywhere we go." He stuck his neck out and smiled, but I wouldn't bite. "Tony called me in because Bucky..."

I tried to suppress a giggle,but it didn't work. DAMNIT!

Sebastian smiled. "His middle name is Buchanan. We've always called him Bucky."

"Your brother is lying Sebastian. I was here on time, and he hit me with the fucking door!" 

His eyebrows were raised and he spoke with sincerity. "I believe you."

"All of the sudden you believe me over your brother. Well good." The elevator door opened and I stepped in, pressing the button to shut the door. "Go tell Tony that and tell your brother I said he can fuck off." 

Of course Sebastian grabbed the door and stepped in before it shut. I hung my head and groaned. "Rachel, let's go get some coffee and I'll tell you all about Bucky Barnes, war hero."


	4. Chapter 4

Sebastian handed me the latte and mumbled, “We’ll talk somewhere more private.” I looked at him, curious and a little frightened to be honest. Sure, I know who Sebastian Stan is. At least the person he lets the public see. There was no mention of him having a brother, much less one with a metal hand. 

He opened the door of the cafe and followed me outside. “Where are we going?”

Sebastian smiled tightly. “I have a small house that only a few people know about. It’s a ten minute walk.” He looked at me sternly. “This is to stay between us Rachel.”

“Sebastian, I could really care less about your house, and as far as your brother goes,” I narrowed my eyes and my voice dropped an octave, “I want to know why he lied and why he’s being a dick about it.”

Sebastian’s jaw clenched and we stopped. “Listen to me right now Rachel. I’m going to tell you what you need to know about Bucky. Don’t. Bad mouth. My. Brother.”

A chill went through me. I really doubt that Sebastian would be violent, but I sure as hell am going to stop talking and start listening. 

 

He unlocked the gate to a one floor ranch. Something you’d expect a small family to live in, not a celebrity. But I guess that’s the point. “Do you stay here a lot?”

He shook his head. “Nah. Sometimes when I need to slip away from everything. I turn off my phone and regroup.

"Surely people need to get in touch with you. What if you have an emergency with your brother?”

He smirked, motioning to the landline phone on the end table. 

I stood in the doorway uncomfortably, hands in my pockets, rolling on my heels, looking everywhere but Sebastian. 

“You want something to drink?”

My attention came to him. “Lil early, dontcha think?”

There came that stupid smirk again when he opened his refrigerator and reached for two bottles of water, offering one to me.

I nodded in embarrassment and took it graciously. “Thanks.” There was a picture of two young boys on his coffee table. I narrowed my eyes to look at it better and saw what had to be Sebastian and Barnes (I’m sorry, but Bucky? I just can’t!) probably about 10 or 11 at a birthday party. 

His eyes crinkled when he smiled at the photo. “Our friend’s birthday party. Bucky is a year older than me, and I followed him everywhere from the day I could walk." He looked at the picture fondly, a faint smile on his face. "He never complained. If his friends didn't want me around, then we left."

Our eyes met. Sebastian looked so vulnerable. "He said, ‘If they don’t want you around, then they’re not worth it. I have tons of friends, but only one brother.’” He looked back at the picture, then to me. “As we got older, his friends were more accepting.” He took a drink of his water and continued. I liked this side of him. He was so caring. I was coming to realize that Sebastian truly is a good person.

“Rachel, what I’m about to tell you is confidential.” He paused and I nodded. “Bucky has been through a lot. And that’s saying it lightly. I need you to promise me that you won’t tell him any of the information that I’m going to give you and you’re not going to treat him like a victim. He’s a man, not a child.” Sebastian’s jaw stiffened and his eye contact was almost harsh. I nodded. 

“Good.” He took a deep breath and appeared to be gathering his thoughts before he continued: “Bucky was a prisoner of war. He wasn’t found until three years later.” I gasped in horror and took his hand. “The bastards tortured him something awful because he was malnourished, beaten, and…” He paused, lowered and gripped the side of his head. 

I spoke gently, “I saw his metal hand. They did that to him? Cut off his hand?”

Sebastian looked up, tears running down his face freely. “It’s his entire arm Rachel!” He let go of my hand, stood up and punched the wall. “THEY CUT OFF HIS ENTIRE FUCKING ARM AND PUT ON THAT…” His face scrunched up in anger, tears still flowing. “FUCKIN METAL THING ON HIM!!” He punched the wall again. I covered my mouth in horror.

What could I say to comfort him? I was afraid to touch him. He turned and asked, “Steve gathered a team to find him.”

My eyes widened. “Steve? My Steve? From the office?”

“Sebastian tightened his lips into a straight line and nodded. "Yyyep.” He ended the word with a pop.

*Holy shit!* I thought silently. Well I’m not getting into *that!*

I stood up and hugged him. “OK enough. That’s enough.”

He pulled me back to look at me and spoke softly. “No Rachel, you need to know.” He looked at the ceiling, took a deep breath and looked at me again. “Bucky gets angry because of the PTSD. And he really thought he was telling the truth about the door. He has looked at me with that far off expression he gets and asked me, 'Really Seb, why would I lie to you about smacking her with the door? If I hit her with the door, you *know* I would apologize.”

I hugged him again and tensed in his arms. “OH GOD SEBASTIAN, I YELLED AT HIM!" I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach. "I’M SO SORRY!!” The tears were forming quickly in the cornersof my eyes. 

“Hey, hey Rachel. You didn’t know.”

I shook my head vehemently. “No. It was wrong.” I couldn’t stop crying. “I’m so stupid. I’m so sorry.” I fell limp in his arms. “I need to apologize.”

“Rachel!”

Our words were interweaving. I couldn’t hear him, nor did I want to. It didn’t matter. I yelled at Barnes, he didn’t know what was going on. 

“Rachel stop!”

Why do I do things like this? Even to Sebastian for God’s sake? He tried to help me with Brian and I yell at him? My head was buried in his chest as I was sobbing. “Your brother is going to hate me.”

“Rachel!” He lift my chin and looked at me. “It’s not…” He shook his head and I stopped. He put his finger on my lips and whispered, “It’s not your fault.” My breath hitched as his face came closer. "Just...breathe. Ok?" I nodded slowly. In all honesty, I really couldn't think with him this close to me. Especially when he was looking at me like he was: his blue eyes were full of compassion, and he was smiling softly which was giving me goosebumps. “I’d really like to kiss you.” Sebastian whispered. 

I was trembling, but I managed to say yes. He slowly kissed my lips, his hands on the back of my head pulling me closer, his mouth open now, sucking on my bottom lip. I quietly whimpered as he ran his tongue over my lip. “Couch?”

“Mmhmm.”

He picked me up bride style and carried me over, sitting me on his lap with my leg stretched out on the couch. I parted my lips slightly and he slipped his tongue in. Oh God! I had never been kissed like this! His tongue rolled slowly around mine, playful and lazily. He moaned as he continued his sweet torture as I lay with my arms around his neck, enjoying every moment. Sebastian sucked on my bottom lip and pulled away to look at me, smiling. Lord, why hadn’t I noticed how extremely sexy this man is?

“I’ve wanted to kiss you since you punched me.”

I laughed quietly, putting my head down, then looking back at him. “Quite a line there Sebastian.” I looked at him and teased, “I’ve wanted to kiss you since you put your lips on mine. You have tasty lips.” 

He looked at me, pretending to be hurt. “Aw c'mon. Really?”

“No not really. I’ve wanted to kiss you since you saved me from my ex in the coffee shop.”

He furrowed his brows. “ Well, this was *not* the time to mention your ex!”

I cupped his cheek and smiled. “You asked the question, and trust me, I am *not* thinking about him when we kiss.” We met halfway and kissed again. Lord, this felt right. I had no words. Just sighs, whimpers, moans, and groans. He cradled the other side of my neck with his hand as his tongue came in contact with my skin. 

“Mmmmm…feels so good.” He left a trail of butterfly kisses down my neck and I could feel him smiling against my skin. His gorgeous blue eyes looked at me with pleasure. “Beautiful.”

My body was tingling from the combination of his low voice, the look on his face, and the feel of his soft lips and tongue on me.

The phone rang. I closed my eyes, silently cursing the person on the other end, until I remembered that this would be important. 

Sebastian got up instantly and reached for the phone. “Yeah,” he said urgently. 

The voice on the other end was shouting, but I couldn’t make out the words. “Yeah, ok. I’m on my way!” The receiver slipped out of his hand to the floor and he was running for the door, shouting, “RACHEL, STAY HERE!” He was out the door before I could respond. 

I stood up and watched him run across the street, a car screeching to a stop to prevent from hitting him. My hand flew to my mouth to stifle a scream. Like hell I’m waiting here!

 

Everyone was in the lobby, faces full of disbelief, shock, and others were holding each other trying to calm each other.

“RACHEL!” Nat pushed through the crowd, rubbing the back of her neck, visibly shaken. She asked in a low, harsh voice, “What’s going on with Barnes?”

I swallowed hard and looked wide-eyed, unfocused, and just shook my head. “How am I supposed to know?”

“HE’S TEARING THE PLACE APART, HIS FACE IS ALL…I DON’T KNOW…" "HE’S LIKE A MONSTER UP THERE, AND STARK IS YELLING TO CALL SEBASTIAN!!” She looked at the crowd who were now focused on us, thanks to her shouting, then she looked back at me. “Why are you here? You two have something?”

“NO!” I glared at her. “I think…” I looked at the ceiling. This is my fault. Stark, Sebastian, who else would be up there? I bit my fingernail, looking at everyone thinking. “Where’s Steve?”

Nat scrunched up her face, shaking her head. “Steve? I dunno. Why? Rachel. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!!”

I made my way through about 30 people, looking for Steve to no avail, then covered my mouth and started crying.

 

Desks were overturned, papers strewn about the floor, holes in the wall. HOLES IN THE WALL??!!! And Sebastian soothing his sobbing brother in his office.

Tony, a horrified look on his face, looked at the damage and sighed. “Rogers, he’s getting worse. You or that brother of his need to get him help. I’m not asking this time. MAKE IT HAPPEN!!” With that he left Steve leaning against the wall, a look of longing to be the one comforting Barnes. 

Meanwhile, Barnes was in distress, barely able to catch his breath. “Why does…this…keep…hap-penning Seb?” The look in his eyes killed Sebastian. He didn’t have an answer to that question. 

“If I knew the people responsible for doing this to you Buck, I would kill them all slowly and painfully. But listen to me. LOOK at me.” They were face to face when Sebastian continued, his jaw clenched: “YOU did not do this. MY BROTHER, BUCKY BARNES DID NOT DO THIS.”

Barnes lowered and shook his head. There was a knock at the door. Before Sebastian could tell them to go away, Barnes had already responded, “YEAH?”

The door cracked open. “Buck? Can I come in?” Steve looked in. He needed to be with Bucky…to comfort him.

Barnes nodded. “Go ahead Sebastian. Thank you for coming. I can always count on you.” They hugged and Sebastian whispered, “I love you Bucky. I’m always here.”

On the way out, Sebastian and Steve shared an uncomfortable look as Bucky called out, “Seb! Tell uh,” he closed his eyes trying to remember, then Sebastian said, “Rachel is fine Bucky. Don’t worry about her, ok?”

That caused Steve to raise an eyebrow as Sebastian shut the door. 

 

When the elevator door opened to the lobby and Sebastian stepped out,nobody paid much attention as they were still deep in conversation. He had his hoodie on and no one would’ve known it was him, but Nat and I were standing by the door and *he* saw *me.* He stopped cold and glared at me. We spoke at the same time. 

“How is he?”

“I told you…”

I moved my head back and looked at him as if to say “you’ve got nerve.” Instead I exclaimed, “I TOLD you?!” I narrowed my eyes and challenged, “I’m sorry about your brother Sebastian, but you…or ANYBODY for that matter…owns me.” I squeezed my eyes shut, immediately regretting my statement, then softened. “I was worried. I'm sorry." Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Nat looking at us in astonishment. 

Rachel, I really don’t want to talk about this here.“ He sighed, looked out the door, then at his watch. "Fifteen minutes.” Nat was looking at him, hanging on every word. He smiled at her in a tight lipped line. His eyes moved to the direction of his house and left.

I tried to walk to the water fountain, but Nat grabbed my arm. “Get your ass back here! Do you want to tell me what’s going on with you two?”

I closed my eyes, letting out a tired sigh. “No I don’t.” I walked out the door before she could ask anything else.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter shows some tension between Seb and Steve. Our Steve is accused of doing hurtful things, but we all know Stevie's a good guy. 
> 
> So you have my permission to tell Seb to shut his face. Or whatever. 
> 
> Hope you guys are enjoying the story!

Sebastian saw me before I knocked on the door and smiled softly before letting me in. "Have a seat. Wanna drink? Water? Tea?"

"Water would be great, thanks." I wanted to ask about his brother but stopped. Let him start. Go at his own pace.

Sebastian walked back in with 2 bottles of water in hand looking like he'd been up for a week. Handing me one, he walked to the couch and plopped down in the middle of it and looked at me with an unreadable expression. No smile, no infamous smirk, nothing. Oh Lord, this can't be good. 

After 4 of the longest seconds of my life I said, "Please stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

I waved my arm motioning to his face. "THAT! You wanted me to come here. Do you want to talk? If not I'm going to go."

His brows came together and he frowned. "Why? I thought that you liked me."

I sighed frustratingly. "I..." God he is annoying! "Sebastian. This isn't funny. What's happening? Is your brother ok? If it's none of my business, tell me. If I caused it, I'm really sorry and I don't know how to make it better. If you hate me for it, I'll go, but hell, the way we are, we'll probably just run into each other tomorrow, but damnit!"

He reached for my hands. "Bucky has had it rough, like I told you. He'll get help. I got him to calm down and Steve is with him now." Sebastian looked me right in the eyes. "And this is NOT your fault Rachel. 

 

 

The following week I went to work as Barnes's assistant. But not before meeting with Tony, Sebastian and Steve in the boardroom. 

Sebastian growled at Tony, "Why is Rogers in on this meeting?"

Oh terrific. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat as I looked at the three men in the room...two of which hated each other. And neither was backing down. 

Tony threw the file down in disgust. "This is the LAST time I'm saying this Stan!! You know very well that if Rogers here didn't find your brother when he did..."

Sebastian put his hand up, closing his eyes. "Yes Stark, he might have been too far gone to get him back at all." 

Tony nodded, talking to him as if he were a child. "That's right. He could be an unstoppable monster."

Sebastian's jaw and fist clenched, and I broke in.

"OK Tony ease up." All three of them were looking at me now...Tony's brow raised, Steve still frowning, and Sebastian was harder to read. Possibly a mixture of 'don't help me, but thank you anyway.'

Tony continued, leaning on the table, fingers entwined in prayer fashion and looked at me. "Well then, let's get started. First off, Sebastian...Rogers stays. They were in the war together, they're friends, and he is capable of keeping Barnes calm as well."

Steve shook his head at Sebastian. "Why do you have a problem with me Stan? Never thought YOU'D be a homophobe!"

I winced. Shit! Sebastian was seething. "ARE YOU FUCKIN KIDDING ME?!! I don't give a shit WHO my brother dates, fucks or whatever you SON OF A BITCH!"

I facepalmed on the table. How in the hell is this supposed to work? It's not. I grabbed my purse and stood up. "When the three of you get your testosterone levels down, call me back in." 

My hand was on the door when Tony shouted, "EVERYBODY SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP!!" I had never seen Tony this pissed before. Sebastian and Steve sat and I nodded, walked back to my chair and sat down. 

Tony,after taking a minute looking between both men, and satisfied that he would have their attention, then slid a file over to me containing approximately 10 pages: the top 6 stapled.

"Rach, the top packet is your contract. Basic stuff. Pretty much the standard, everyday, mumbo-jumbo crap: you don't steal from me, I don't sexually harass you...it hasn't changed since you worked here."

I sat straight-faced, unamused by his so-called wit.

"Underneath are the conditions and rules you MUST abide by in this..." he looked at Sebastian, Steve and rolled his eyes with extreme exaggeration, "situation. If you can't abide to any or all of these, I won't be able to hire you."

My head whipped up. I looked at him as if to say 'are you SERIOUS?' This time he was poker faced. Sebastian sighed, a stern look on his face and Steve sat, glaring at Sebastian. 

I fanned through the pages, looked up to see three pairs of eyes looking at me. I huffed. "Gentlemen, I'm not going to be able to read this if the three of you are going to watch me."

Tony stood. "Of course. Stop by my office, let me know what you decide." He walked out, Steve patted my shoulder and whispered, "Stay Rach," and followed Tony, leaving Sebastian behind. I began to read, but he hadn't moved. Without looking up, I mumbled, "Door's behind me."

I could hear his smirk. "I have every intention of staying here."

"Can't you stay somewhere else? Where's your brother?"

"That's Mr Barnes to you."

I slowly looked up, shooting daggers at him. Counting each point on my fingers, I began: "First, I didn't accept the job yet; second, if I do, he will be JAMES since I'll be working WITH him, not FOR him; third, I don't know why you have a problem with me all of the sudden; and lastly and most importantly...what is your problem with Steve? The man saved your brother!!!"

Sebastian looked at his hands, now forming into fists, then punched the table and stood up. I jumped, my anger turned into confusion. "You know that Bucky and Steve were dating, right?"

I nodded.

His jaw was clenching. "When Bucky has episodes, Steve will sometimes take advantage of it."

I looked at him in horror. "NO! Not Steve! He's a great guy! He'd never..."

"THE HELL HE IS!!" Sebastian flew out of his chair, and started pacing the room, agitated. "The reason this office was a fuckin mess is that Bucky thought he was in the war again and was being brainwashed. And since..." he narrowed his eyes and sarcastically said "*your Stevie* saved him, Bucky believes that he needs Steve to keep him sane.

"I found them in Bucky's bed," he growled. I don't think I need to say anything else." Sebastian turned around, silently crying. When I got up to comfort him he turned back and exclaimed, "DON'T!" He stormed out of the room, headed for Steve's office, murder on his face.

"NO! SEBASTIAN STOP!!" The first person I saw was Wanda. "WANDA, CALL TONY NOW!!" Sebastian kicked open Steve's door and all hell broke loose.

 

Sebastian was getting his hand x-rayed while Steve was laying in a hospital bed, one eye swollen shut, and a split lip, connected to IVs. I was still back at the office, sitting in the boardroom, completely stoic. I refused to believe that Steven Rogers would do such a vile thing. Tony walked in.

"Well Rachel, thanks to your boyfriend..."

I pointed my finger at him angrily. "He's NOT my boyfriend!"

"Fine. Whatever." He sat in a chair throwing his pen down casually across the table. "You read the contract?"

I looked at him and huffed. "Yeah Tony, with all the screaming and fighting, sure, I had a second to look it over." I looked down at the contract with glazed eyes, my mind on what Sebastian said. "Tony, do you know why Sebastian is mad at Steve?"

Tony studied me, and after a few seconds asked, "Do you?"

"We both know what Steve is being ACCUSED of. Do you think it's true?"

Tony's face showed no expression. "Do you?"

"Damnit Tony! Can't you give me a straight answer? Of course I don't believe it's true! How long have you known Steve? Seven, eight years? He is not capable of doing this!"

Tony leaned forward, arms crossed on the table. "No Rachel I don't think Stan is telling the truth. I don't know why he'd lie about it either."

"Where is Barnes right now?"

Tony facepalmed and groaned. "He's on temporary leave and ordered mental health services. He's at his appointment now. Give your boy..." Tony cleared his throat as I glared at him. "Give Stan this card."

I took it and scrunched my nose. "Psychiatry and behavioral health services by Loki and Zola?

"Fine. I'm going to the hospital." I put the card in my purse and left the room, heading towards the elevator and then to the hospital.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does anything good happen when Loki or Zola is involved? 
> 
> Hell no!


	6. Chapter 6

Peggy was sitting next to Steve holding his hand while he slept. The sight was a lot to take in. Peggy had such strong feelings for Steve, never giving up on him. We had stayed up many nights, I tried to console her as best I could, knowing full well that Steve had always loved Bucky. 

So when Sebastian tells me that Steve is taking advantage of Bucky, I refuse to believe it. I may not have been around, but I know Steve Rogers. Steve does not use people! 

“Rachel.” Peggy saw me, frowning as tears fell down her cheek. We both looked at Steve. “He has three broken ribs, internal bleeding and he talks in his sleep, saying things like…"Bucky, don’t make me do this…” or “end of line.”

I pulled her aside and asked, “How are *you* doing Peg?”

She shrugged and smiled sadly. “Holdin up. It’s hard to see him like this. But…” She drifted off, as if looking for the answer to the question she did not want to ask, and turned her back to me.

I took her by the shoulder. “What Peg?”

She spun around and demanded, “Why did this happen? Why did Sebastian do this?” She took a long look at Steve, lip split, eye closed up and swollen. “You know that they’re together again, don’t you?”

THAT I did not know. “No!” I was honestly stunned. I thought it was just during the war!“

Peggy sighed and shook her head. “When they came home, they thought it was best to just stay friends.” A sad smile appeared. “That lasted about a week. Those two are soul mates. But they keep it out of the office. Steve thinks it’s nobody’s business but their own. Bucky could care less, but he respects Steve’s wishes and goes along with it.”

“That’s been, what…eight months now?”

She nodded.

“Apparently Sebastian doesn’t know either, but still, that’s no excuse for what he’s done!”

“Peg?” We both looked over and saw a weak Steve, one eye barely open, but awake. I asked Peggy, “Give me a second, ok?”

I walked over to the bed and took his hand, my thumb caressing his. “Steve, I’m so sorry for what Sebastian did to you.” My tears welling up were from anger. He tried to speak, but I shook my head. “Not a word. I will take care of this.”

I pushed his hair back and kissed his forehead, mumbling “Sonofabitch is gonna pay.” My blood was boiling as I stormed out of the room, ready for a war of my own.

 

Figuring Sebastian wouldn’t be stupid enough to go back to the office, I went to his house. 

I didn’t bother knocking. This was no time to be polite. If he was there, I wouldn’t leave until I got the entire story. The tv was on, but the common room was empty. “WHERE ARE YOU?!!”

He came rushing out of the kitchen, beer in hand. “WHAT THE FUCK RACHEL?!”

I was so angry, I couldn’t see straight. I approached him, my finger poking him in the chest. “I TOLD YOU THAT STEVE ROGERS WOULD NOT DO ANYTHING TO HURT YOUR BROTHER, BUT YOU WOULDN’T LISTEN!! YOU JUST JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS! DID YOU EVER THINK TO TALK TO YOUR BROTHER?!! THEY’RE DATING AGAIN JACKASS!!!”

Sebastian, still taken aback that I barged in his house, stared at me wide-eyed, mouth agape. “I-I didn’t lie.” He put his head down, ashamed, then looked at me. “I didn’t know they were dating Rachel.” He turned, ran his hand through his hair and cursed.

“So you just ASSUME that Steve is taking advantage of your brother instead of asking him? Did you ever think of doing that? HUH?! Instead you just kick Steve’s ass, put him in the hospital with three broken ribs. They’re keeping their relationship a secret from everyone in the office.” I glared at him. “Apparently from you too!”

Sebastian slumped on the couch, facepalming. “Oh God!” He looked at me, brows bumped together, “Where’s Bucky?”

I looked at him in disbelief. “How the fuck would I know? I’ve been at the hospital visiting my FRIEND!!”

He stood up, his eyes wet and took my hands in his. “Rachel, I’m so sorry. I’ll understand if you don’t forgive me. I need to see my brother. Just…will you please meet me here later this evening? Please?”

I sighed in frustration, shaking my head and glared at him, “I don’t know. Just go.”

He ran to the door, came back, and quietly said, “I am…truly sorry Rachel.” He grabbed his jacket and ran out the door. 

 

I avoided my phone for two days. Constant texts and calls went unanswered. Sam worried about my well-being, knowing about my anxiety over losing my job in the first place, my divorce from Brian and everything else I had been going through. I mustered up a smile when I got his calls. He was like the big brother I’d always wanted.

 

Nat left double the messages but they were mostly of curiosity…“What are you hiding?” “What’s up with Barnes?” “YOU AND SEBASTIAN STAN?!!” Not once did she ask about ME in…looking at my message count…17 messages! Luckily Sebastian didn’t have my number, so he wouldn’t ask why I blew him off. If he cared. Hell, I don’t care! 

My phone rang. I picked it up and made a face. Lord, I’d rather talk to a telemarketer than Nat. “Can’t you get a hint already??” 

I had to get out. Food. I needed to eat. The closest diner was clearing out from the lunch crowd, so I ate my burger and fries peacefully. Until my cell rang. I rolled my eyes. What the hell! It was Sam. I really should talk to Sam. 

“Hello.”

“Girl, where have you been? I’ve been calling and leaving messages! I KNOW you got them! Next time…no there won’t be a next time. I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!!”

I moved the phone away from my ear and huffed.

“OK, OK, must you be so overdramatic? I’m fine!”

“So why haven’t you been here? What’s up with Stan and Rogers. Why is Barnes acting like a maniac? What the fuck is going on Rach?!”

I squeezed my eyes shut and cursed silently. “It’s really complicated Sam, I can’t talk about it.” 

“Well Barnes is being replaced for now by some jerkoff named Rumlow.” Sebastian was walking down the sidewalk and unfortunately saw me and was coming in.

I groaned. “Sam, I’ll call you back.” I tilt my head. “What?”

“Nice to see you too. I thought you were going to meet me.” He looked hurt.

I shrugged casually. “Well, I didn’t show.” Sebastian took a chair opposite me.

Looking at him expressionless, I said, “Join me, why don’t you?”

“Rachel please.”

I sat back in my chair, impatient. “Sebastian, do you really think that I want to talk to you? Why aren’t you with your brother?” 

“He’s not answering his phone. I don’t know where he is.”

I had a french fry half way to my mouth, then smirked. “You mean, *I* know where he is and *you* don’t?” I shook my head. “Seems like someone *else* doesn’t want to talk to you either.”   
Sebastian frowned and swallowed hard. “You’re right. I know. But look at it from my side. Bucky was protective of me when we were kids. He’s…” Sebastian put his head down, then looked up, worried. “He’s different now. I want him to be taken care of.” He carefully put his hands on top of mine. “I know NOW that what I did was horribly wrong and you, Bucky, and Steve have every reason to hate me. But you have to see it from my side too.”

I softened. Steve may be my friend, and definitely didnt deserve to get beaten up, but this was a matter of a little brother protecting his big brother. Lord, I had to find a way to be a neutral party in this mess. “OK, we are both guilty of jumping to conclusions. But one thing you need to do is apologize to Steve.”

He nodded. “Agreed.”

I reached for my purse, searching for the business card. “Your brother is here right now.” I slid the card across the table. 

His brows furrowed. “Loki and Zola?” 

I shrugged. “Tony set up the appointment I suppose and put him on leave. That’s all I know. You should pick him up and take him to see Steve. And apologize to BOTH of them.”

I continued eating my lunch as I watched him study the card. He looked at me and asked, “Come with?”

I chewed my food silently as I looked at the hopeful face of the annoying, frustrating man I was starting to fall for. “Sure.” 

 

“Can I help you sir?” The secretary at the psychiatric clinic was pleasant as she spoke to Sebastian. 

“Yes, is Buck…” he stopped short and corrected himself, “Is James Barnes still in with the doctor?”

She smiled at him. “He’s finishing up with Dr Zola right now. If you want to have a seat, it shouldn’t be too long.”

Sebastian nodded and sat next to me, slightly agitated. “I should be in there with him. Why didn’t Stark tell me about this?”

“In my opinion, Tony’s about fed up with the whole situation and he wants James to get the help that he hasn’t been getting as of yet.” Trying to be more sympathetic, I went a different way. “James is very good at his job and is spoken highly of by Tony, so I’ve heard. Tony is concerned about him as well and wants him better…as we all do.” I smiled softly at Sebastian, my anger at him dissipated. 

Sebastian whispered, “Thank you Rachel."

 

From the hallway in the inner office, we saw a red-eyed, exhausted James followed by a very short, odd-looking man, who spoke to the secretary. Sebastian darted out of his chair. "DOCTOR! MAY I COME IN?”

James looked at him, startled to see his brother. The doctor opened the door, smiling at Sebastian. Oh god, this guy was creepy.

 

Holding out his hand, he said, “Ah, you must be the brother, Sebastian. Very pleased to meet you. I’m Dr Zola. James is very disturbed…”

Sebastian clenched his fist and his jaw tensed. Shit! Please don’t do anything here!

The doctor cleared his throat. “Allow me to rephrase…”

“Please do.” Sebastian’s teeth were gritted as he spoke and poor James stood, watching them interact without saying a word, looking so vulnerable. I had never thought I would ever want to console this man, but I wanted to wrap him in a blanket and tell him that everything would be ok.

Since my attention was on James, I missed the conversation between Sebastian and the doctor, but I heard the last words from Sebastian. “GO TO HELL ZOLA!”

I stared wide-eyed at Sebastian, who had James by the arm as the walked through the outer office and towards the door. “Rachel, let’s go.” I hurriedly walked out, not so much because of Sebastian’s tone, but I wanted to get as far away as possible from that freak.

 

I really didn’t want to be at Sebastian’s house with the brothers, but Sebastian asked me to come. Seeing that I’m waaaaay too involved in this than I’d like to be, well here I am. 

And here we are, at the kitchen table, Sebastian looking at James with worry and concern, James with his jaw clenched avoiding eye contact with his brother, and me, sitting between both, uncomfortable and silent, pleading internally that one of them would talk. But they are apparently BOTH stubborn hotheads.

 

“James, I believe Sebastian has something he needs to tell you before we go to the hospital.” I glared at Sebastian and got up, walking to the common room. 

James, arms crossed, looked at Sebastian angrily. Sebastian started, “Why didn’t you tell me about you and Steve, Bucky?”

I stormed back in. “DON’T YOU DARE MAKE THIS HIS FAULT!” Walking to Barnes’s chair, I touched his arm and said, “He’s been through enough Sebastian. Do it right ok?” 

As I started walking back out, he replied, “Quit eavesdropping!”

“I don’t even want to be here! But I want to make sure that you two get to the hospital…and apologize to Steve!” I walked outside and hopefully Sebastian and James would work this out. 

 

An hour later after pacing in the small yard, cursing Sebastian for being an ass, cursing myself for liking his ass…as the rest of him, they both walked out the door, exhausted and red-eyed. Should I say something? Wait for them? How do I even talk to Barnes? 

But I didn’t need to worry about that. He put his arms around me, pulling me in for a hug. I stiffened, not knowing what to make of this, but Sebastian nodded and mouthed ‘it’s ok.’ James pulled back, looking at me full of regret and said, “Rachel, Seb had told me that he informed you everything that happened to me…”

My eyes welled up. “James, I’m so sorry that I yelled at you…”

 

He turned to Sebastian and they both chuckled. Sebastian shrugged, “I told you bro.”

But I didn’t care. “It wasn’t right.”

James gripped my shoulders, his face sincere. “It’s…ok!” I hesitated, looking at him, noticing for the first time how much he and Sebastian resembled each other. An Uber pulled up in front of the house and we walked out the gate, Sebastian holding open the car door for me as James walked around, getting in on the other side. I was sandwiched in between them both as we drove to the hospital. Talk about uncomfortably warm…

James reached for my hand. “Rachel…May I call you Rachel now?”

I nodded, smiling awkwardly.

“I want to thank you for your discretion on all of this. Especially concerning Steve.” 

“James, Steve has always been a good friend of mine. As for your relationship, I’m very happy for the both of you. Your secret is safe with me.” Looking down and clearing my throat, I looked back up at him and said, “Listen, I don’t want to get involved in your…” I looked from James to Sebastian… “family problems. You two go to the hospital and see Steve. And you…” I kicked Sebastian in the ankle, “better apologize sincerely!”

“OW!!” Sebastian reached down, caressing his sore ankle, while James bit back a smile. I hope it hurt, but wanted to kiss him too. UGH!


	7. Chapter 7

As much as I didn’t want to, I finally called Nat. She may be a pain in the ass, but she’s still my best friend and I’d like to think deep down that she is concerned about me.

Stretched out on the couch, shoes kicked off, water bottle in hand, I scrolled down to her number and hit call. It barely rang once.

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? DO YOU NOT CARE THAT I’VE BEEN WORRIED ABOUT YOU? AND WHAT’S WITH SEBASTIAN…”

“THAT!” I yelled into the phone. Lord I wanted to hit her! “QUIT ASKING ABOUT SEBASTIAN! THERE’S NOTHING GOING ON! I BARELY KNOW HIM!” I paused, running my hand through my hair and cursing quietly. “Nat, I didn’t know Sebastian and Barnes were brothers. I barely know Sebastian at all. Tony put Barnes on leave until he gets his shit sorted out.” 

“Ok Rach, I’m sorry. But I wish you would’ve called me. So…if Barnes is on leave, what happens to you? Do you work for his replacement?”

My eyes widened. Yeah, what *does* happen to me? Who did Sam say he was? Rumlow? “We haven’t gotten that far yet. I’ll have to talk to Tony and go from there. But more importantly, I want to see how Steve is.” I squeezed my eyes shut. AAAHHH fuck!! Please don’t say you wanna go, please don’t say you wanna go.

“OK then, let me know what’s going on with everything when you find out?”

“Sure. Talk to you later.” I hung up and put my phone down, breathing a sigh of relief. Lord, if Sebastian was still at the hospital and she was with me…“OK Rach, let’s not think about THAT, shall we…”

 

Steve was sitting up, he and Barnes oblivious to pretty much everything around them as I walked in the room. A nurse asked to take his blood pressure and neither of them flinched. Holding hands, smiling like idiots, lost in each other’s eyes. She couldn’t help but smile at them.

Sebastian, sitting in a chair off to the side, rolled his eyes, but at least it was followed by a chuckle. He was close enough to nudge his brother in the back of the knee, which made Barnes awkwardly stumble. I bit my lip, hiding a laugh. It was so weird seeing James like this. Nice…but weird. 

“Dude!” Sebastian groaned. “Please let the nurse do her job! Steve will still be here when she’s done.”

Barnes kissed the palm of Steve’s hand, which he probably hadn’t let go since they’ve been here and stepped back, smiling shyly at the nurse.

I stuck my neck out slowly as I stood there. “Am I interrupting?”

Sebastian and Barnes both looked at me, startled. My god, the resemblance was UNCANNY!! Barnes came at me, open arms and hugged me. How often is this going to happen? It’s frickin scary!!

He whispered, “You are an angel sent from heaven Rachel.” 

I pulled back to see his eyes were almost sparkling. And you my friend are freaking me out! “Um…thank you?”

He laughed and took my hand. “Get in here darlin.”

As he pulled…yes PULLED me into the Twilight Zone…Sebastian couldn’t help but laugh, and Steve smiled, then winced from his split lip.

I looked at Sebastian curiously. “Apparently everything is good with the three of you now?” 

He hugged me too. Actually, he lifted me up, hugging me. I slapped his back…his very muscular back. Lord help me. “Put me down,” I hissed and glared at him.

Looking apologetically at the brothers I conceded, “I’m sorry, I’m just not a touchy feely kinda person. I just want to see Steve and I’ll let you get back to your…” I twist my lips at Sebastian and Barnes… “lovefest.”

By then, the nurse was done. “Steve!” I walked over and gently hugged him, whispering, “Jackass apologized?”

Steve smiled and gave me a berating glare. “Language Rachel.”

I repeated his words sarcastically. “Well, I’m glad everything is ok. When are you getting out?”

“Tomorrow. I’ll be staying at Bucky’s for a while, and back to work in a week.” He smiled sheepishly. This was a man who was truly happy and in love. Pfftt, what does THAT feel like?

“Let him spoil you Steve. You deserve it.” I hugged him again. “Call me, ok?” He nodded and smiled that boyish smile again.

I threw my purse over my shoulder and headed for the door. “See you guys…whenever.” I made it to the hallway when…

“Rachel!”

I closed my eyes. Damnit! “Yeah?” I turned slowly.

Sebastian looked like a sad puppy. Oh crap, go away. “Listen…I’m really sorry for everything. Especially Steve.” He tried reaching for my hand but I moved it away. He frowned and nodded. “I’m not staying here. Third wheel and all.”

“OK,” I nodded nonchalantly and turned to leave.

“So that’s it?”

My face was blank, my voice emotionless. “What? You’re brother’s on leave, you apologized, we’re not dating…we’re good, right?”

He furrowed his brows, studied me and then shrugged. “I suppose we are. See ya around.” I turned to go, feeling his eyes on me, wanting to run back to his arms, telling him that I did in fact have feelings for him...strong feelings, but I didn’t. I wanted him to call me back. That is what we do, right? Just one more time Sebastian. One more. My nose began to itch due to the threat of tears about to fall. When I turned the corner I could see that he was already gone.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting a bit more exciting in this chapter, I promise. I hope everyone is enjoying my story. It's not a genre I've done in the past, so I'm kinda nervous.

So here I sat in Tony’s office, nine AM the following morning, as he played with a tiny action figure. It was a robot looking thing, red and gold with slit eyes…more like a coke can than anything. “I call him ‘Iron Man.’”

 

Looking at him with impatience I dripped with sarcasm. “You know, Nat was talking about dressing up in some leather black cat suit. Why don’t you dress up as this one and the two go over to Loki and Zola’s and fuck them up. That Zola is a *freak* Tony! Where did you find him?”

“He came recommended.” Tony raised his eyebrows and pointed at me. “By Barnes’s stand-in, Rumlow.”

“Yeah, who IS this chump Tony? Where did he come from? And if he recommended this Zola creature, I would think twice about hiring him.”

“Damn Rachel! When did you get so bitter? You just spew hate all around here.” Tony shook his head and continued. “He’s in Barnes’s office right now. Go get yourself acquainted.” He waved me away…aparently dismissing me. Alrighty then. 

I left his office, and walked to the elevator. When I got in, I pressed 25 and the door almost shut, until I saw a hand stop the door. Of course the first thing I thought was Sebastian. But why would Sebastian be here? And why am I thinking about him. Shut up Rachel! Then I saw who it was. Oh Lord, I wish it WAS Sebastian!

“Well hello gorgeous.” The most annoying man in the office entered the elevator.

 

I grit my teeth. “Lance, my name is Rachel. Rachel Sinclair. I’m sure you remembered it from when I had your ass sent to HR for sexual harassment.”

His ever present smirk seemed to grow when he said, “Enjoy looking at my ass, do ya honey?”

“MR. Tucker, there are cameras in here. You already crossed the line and I have proof. Although I’m sure I don’t need any…I see that Hope is head of the department now.”

His smirk disappeared. “That bitch hates me.”

The elevator door opened and I stepped out. “It’s not just her Lance.” I stepped out, leaving him speechless. How can that man still be here? 

 

“Rach!! You’re here! How’s Steve?” Yep, it’s Nat. 

I nodded. “Great. Everything’s good with…well, it’s all good. Hey,” I didn’t want to hear anything about Sebastian. “Do you know anything about this Rumlow guy?”

She shook her head. “No. I’ve never seen him before.”

I looked down the hall at the office, door half open, and looked back at her. “Well, I guess I gotta get to work.” 

I dreaded working with this man. What kind of person could actually think that this Zola freak would be a good doctor? A shiver went through me thinking about that creepy smile.

“I’m at his computer now.” I paused before I walked in. What is this about? “Yeah, the files are being deleted as we speak. By the time he gets back to work, I’ll be long gone with the rest of the stuff and Stark will be none the wiser.”

I narrowed my eyes. Like hell! I knocked gently and opened the door, smiling innocently. Yeah, I can play dumb, asshole.

Rumlow smiled awkwardly and said into the phone, “I should be home about six thirty sweetheart. Love you.” He stood up, arm out. “You must be Rachel Sinclair. Everyone calls me Rumlow. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you as well Rumlow. Looks like we’ll be working together temporarily.” Hmmm…not gonna give me your first name? Well if THAT’S not a red flag…

Now I have to find out who he is. Great. All I wanted to do was come back to work so I could pay my bills and keep my apartment. How the hell did I get in this mess???

 

I went along with my business, at the same time trying to keep an eye on Rumlow. Then again, what’s he going to accomplish with me sitting across from him. 

When I left the office, I headed for the kitchen to get coffee and Sam was there. “Hey baby girl, how’s it going?”

I rolled my eyes, then looked behind me to make sure nobody was behind me. Walking closer to him, I whispered, “Sam, something is up with this guy.”

He furrowed his brows. “What do you mean?”

I told him what I overheard. “He deleted files. Strange phone calls.” I shook my head. “Where did Tony find him? What do I do? Tell him?” 

Sam put his hand on my shoulder, looking at me in concern. “Don’t worry Rach. We’ll figure it out.” He nodded at me reassuringly and went back to his office.

When I got back to my desk, Rumlow had just put a paper through the shredder and looked up at me, momentarily startled, but his face quickly transformed into an expression of innocent professionalism.

“Very good. There’s a fresh pot in the kitchen. You should get some.” My eyes were smiling behind my cup, but I was sneering at him as I spoke.

“Ah, not so much of a coffee drinker.”

 

Damn you! How am I supposed to get in that computer? And then it hit me. Barnes. But I don’t want him to get into this. And I’m not going to bug Steve about this. Which leaves ooooonnnne person. I inwardly groaned. It wouldn’t be so bad if I had his phone number. I could ask Tony, but then I’d have to tell him why. I facepalmed and tapped my pen on the desk. There HAD to be another way!!

“Everything ok Ms Sinclair?”

“Hmmm? Oh, sorry. Some of my calculations aren’t working out. Nothing I can’t handle.” 

This day needed to go quicker so I could get out of here and REALLY get to work!

 

At five o'clock I practically ran out of the office. As much as I’d rather have gone home and cried, I went to Sebastian’s house hoping he’d be there. No lights were on that I could see. I pulled on the gate and it was locked. Fanfuckintastic! I sighed in frustration as I looked at the house, cursing him. The one time I want to see him, he’s not here! “You’re killing me Sebastian!” I turned to leave and slammed right into a very hard wall…which was in fact Sebastian himself. 

I looked up at the ever-smirking man who said humorously, “Miss me already? And no I don’t want to kill you. You’re too cute.”

I scrunched my nose at him. “Stop. This is serious. We need to talk. It’s about this guy that’s covering for your brother. There’s something up with him and I don’t know what to do.”

The expression on his face drastically changed to horror. He put his hand on the small of my back as he got his keys out of the pocket of his black leather jacket, unlocked the gate, and led me into his house.

We sat on the couch, his eyes full of worry. His head dropped as I talked. Yes, I admit it was breaking my heart. I told him about the phone call, deleting files and shredding papers. “Sebastian, this Rumlow guy is up to something. HE is the one that recommended Zola!”

Sebastian’s head shot up, his face full of rage. “WHAT THE FUCK?!!” He stood up, running his hand through his hair and let out a scream. My eyes got huge. As he headed for the door, I got up, “Don’t think you’re leaving me here!!”

 

The door almost broke off the hinge when he threw it open. He was a good eight inches taller than me and in much better shape, so I had a hard time keeping up. “WAIT!!”

His face was twisted in anger which looked exactly like his brother’s at the moment. “C'MON!!” Thank God a cab was coming. I wouldn’t doubt that Sebastian would’ve jumped on the damn thing to get it to stop. Thankfully he didn’t have to. He opened the door, we both got in and he practically growled, “LOKI AND ZOLA’S. NOW!!”

I buried my head in my hands. That freaky little man is going to meet his maker today.

I couldn’t look at Sebastian. He was scaring me. I was really dreading what was going to happen next. 

We got to the office ten minutes later. Sebastian threw money at the cabbie. I apologized to him, and all hell broke out. Sebastian swung open the door and didn’t say a word. When I got in, the secretary was on her feet. “SIR!!” But I could hear Sebastian yelling and Zola pleading to be put down. A man with long black hair and green eyes in a black suit came to the window and ordered the secretary to call the police.

“DOCTOR, PLEASE!” He looked at me and I swallowed hard. For as much as Zola was creepy, THIS guy was mysterious. OK, he was hot too, but now is not the time. I opened the door. Damn, his eyes were mesmerizing! “Let me get him!” I didn’t wait for an answer. I headed towards the screaming. Two doors down, Sebastian was holding Zola up against the wall, hand squeezed around his neck. “WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY BROTHER?!” As much as I liked seeing this freak in pain, I didn’t want Sebastian to be arrested. 

“LET HIM GO SEBASTIAN!! THIS ISN’T THE WAY TO DO THIS!!” I begged him. When he wouldn’t let go, I hissed, “How are you going to help your brother from jail?”

Sebastian looked over at me, softening, and let Zola down. Sneering at the doctor, he said, “You can bet that I’m going to shut this practice down when I find out what you are up to Zola!”

 

 

I managed to get him out of there as quickly as I could, and took him to my apartment. Why, I’m not sure. I guess when a driver asks you where to go, it’s instinct to give your own address. As soon as we got in the door he crumbled to the floor and broke down, crying.

I immediately took him in my arms, cradling him back and forth, as my own tears fell. Sebastian doesn’t deserve this. His brother DEFINITELY doesn’t deserve this. I wish I had words to comfort him.

I whispered, “I’m so sorry.” We sat on the floor for the longest time while he sobbed in my arms.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short one. Sorry bout that. Hope you're enjoying it though.

Sebastian had calmed down after about an hour. All I could do was hold him and let him cry. What could I say to comfort him? I ordered a pizza and we ate on the couch in front of the tv, the noise filling the uncomfortable silences between our strained small talk.

He turned towards me. “Rachel, I’m sorry I had to put you through all of this.”

“Sebastian, it’s not your fault.” I stopped him before he went any further. Taking his hand and smiling fondly I continued, “I admit, I feel like I’m in the middle of an outrageous action movie, but *you* didn’t get me involved.” I tilt my head, wincing as I spoke, “As I recall it was technically Tony that got me involved.” 

He smiled at that and cupped my cheek. “Thank you Rachel.”

I nodded and smiled back. “So, now what? You don’t want to tell your brother about this yet do you?”

“NO!” He sat straight up. “Bucky doesn’t need to know anything. He’s been through so much already.” Sebastian slumped back down, defeated, and sighed. “Why is all of this happening?” He covered his face and groaned. 

“Hey,” I crooned. “Kick off your shoes and lay down here.”

He did as I asked without question. His head was on my lap and body stretched out the entire length of my couch. I pulled the throw blanket over him and rubbed his shoulder. “We’ll figure it out Seb. Just relax for now, ok?” I picked up the remote and looked for something decent to watch, hoping Sebastian would get some sleep.

He moved his head slowly, looking at me curiously. “Did you call me Seb?”

“Huh? Oh yeah sorry…” I half smiled. 

He took my hand. “No…I like it.” Sebastian’s face seemed to relax at that moment. It was nice. 

Oh god help me!!!

 

 

It was dark. I opened my eyes and heard quiet snoring. Holy hell we were still on the couch and it was…I moaned as I moved my sore neck to look at the clock…2:06 AM. I nudged Sebastian’s shoulder. “Sebastian. Hey, wake up. It’s late.”

He mumbled incoherently and put his arm around me. He was laying on his side, his face almost smashed against my stomach. “Ugh. Sebastian! Up!” He lift his head,barely opened his eyes and grumbled.

“It’s two in the morning. You gotta go. C'mon.”

He put his head back down. “Stayin.” 

Damnit! I looked at him and my heart was aching. How could I kick him out. I couldn’t. “Ok babe, let me slide out of here and the couch is yours.” I managed to manuever myself out and looked at him, already fast asleep. 

Smiling softly I walked to the bedroom yawning. As I got into bed, I looked at the pillow beside me and wished he was here to cuddle with…then I buried my face in my pillow and groaned.

 

Seven o'clock I woke up and found a note by my coffee pot. Sebastian was indeed gone to my unexpected disappointment. 

 

Dear Rachel, 

I’m sorry for yesterday’s disaster. I wish you didn’t have to be part of this mess. Thank you so much for your kindness. Last night would have been so much better without me crying on your shoulder like an idiot. 

You were a great comfort to me Rachel and I enjoyed sleeping with you. (I can see you glaring/smiling right now.) I mean well Ms Sinclair. You know I have the highest respect for you. 

Call me at ******** and we’ll meet up for lunch to talk about where we go from here…concerning my brother of course.

Seb

 

Well, at least I have his number now. I reread the note a few more times and frowned. He left without saying goodbye and the last paragraph sounded like we were having a business meeting more than anything. And another thing…WHY DO I CARE??!! I tossed the note in the air, groaning out loud and headed for the shower. "Get him out of your mind Rachel!!!" 

 

Rumlow wasn’t in when I got to work. I went back by the door and peeked up and down the hall. Clear. His desk was locked. “Of course.” I couldn’t risk turning on his computer yet. 

I tapped my finger on his desk, then heard footsteps. I made it to my desk as Rumlow walked in. “Well good morning Rumlow! How are you today?” Asshole. The smile on my face was hurting my cheeks.

He looked distracted as he looked through the file in his hands. “Hmm? Hey, hi Rachel. How’s it going?” He sat down in front of the computer, turned it on, and waited impatiently.

I raised my eyebrows. “Everything ok? Do you need help?”

“Nah. I got it. Thanks.”

Pulling his phone out of his pocket with a frown on his face he texted someone…of course he wouldn’t make calls when I’m here…and this looked urgent. 

I was quite enjoying this. Going ahead with my own work while Rumlow continued texting, my mind wandered to Sebastian. What is he doing right now? Talking with Barnes? Hopefully not back at Zola’s office! I pinched the bridge of my nose and silently cursed myself. Stop thinking about him! After five minutes of trying to work, I had to text him. I was worried, ok? Concerned for his well-being. Yeah, shut up!

I pulled my phone from my purse and scrolled down to his number. 

//It’s Rachel. I was worried that you would go back to Zola’s. Are you ok?//

I really wanted to leave the office, but I had to keep an eye on Rumlow. 

//Hey Rachel. No, I’m being good. lol Sorry. Anything happening there?//

I bit my lip holding back a smile. Shut up Sebastian. This is serious. //Yeah. Rumlow’s freaking out over something. He doesn’t want my help, so I guess it has to do with your brother. His desk is locked so that was a bust. I wish I had more to tell you//

//I just appreciate that you’re there Rachel. Just be careful ok. Meet me at 12//

//ok//

 

If I could have someone go to the bathroom for me I would, since it was the only time I left the office until lunch. 

Sebastian was waiting for me at the coffee shop, sitting by the window, at the same table. I smiled sarcastically. “*This* table?” I took off my coat, went to place an order, and heard him say, “I’m sorry, but it was the only table open. Lunchtime, ya know.” I looked back to see him shrug and mouth “sorry.”

I rolled my eyes and smirked. As I turned back to look at the menu on the wall all I could see was his sleeping face on my couch. His beautiful innocent face... DAMNIT!!!! 

“So,” I sat down and took a sip of my iced tea, “there’s not much I can tell you.” I shrugged. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be Rachel. He’s not going to be sloppy. He’s involved with Zola and,” Sebastian sat back and looked out the window, shaking his head, angry. 

My mouth was full with my sandwich, so all I could do was cover his hand. “HMMNNN!!!” The couple at the next table looked over at us, but I didn’t care. After I swallowed, I wiped my mouth and exclaimed, “You’re NOT going there AGAIN!!” He looked at me, slowly calming down and I took my hand back. 

I had to get him to calm down. “How’s your brother? Happy now that Steve is home I bet.”

Sebastian smiled. “Yeah, turns out Bucky’s a pretty good nurse. He waits on Steve hand and foot.”

To have a happy relationship like that. How lucky!

“Pffft, are you kidding? It’s driving Steve crazy! Hell, the other day Steve sneezed and moaned as quietly as he could,” Sebastian chuckled, “and Bucky went running. You’d think Steve had fallen down the stairs!”

I spit out my tea, giggling. The drink landing on the table and dangerously close to Sebastian, and my eyes widened. He grabbed a napkin and wiped my mouth as he smirked.

“Ooooo, if that would’ve hit me!” He narrowed his eyes and he humorously threatened. 

I sat back in my chair and crossed my arms. “You’d what, tough guy?”

“Well, I never hit a lady, but then…” he winced as he looked at me.

“That’s cold!” I held up my fist. “Right hook Stan.”

He rolled his head back and forth. “Not scared Sinclair.”

We looked at each other silently, our eyes smiling behind our drinks.

Good Lord, will that sinkhole EVER show up?


	10. Chapter 10

I looked at my cell on the table and saw that I had 15 minutes left. How did lunch go so fast? Could it be from the blue-eyed, dark brown haired, beautiful bearded, great smelling…no I wasn’t smelling him! But damn he smelled good! And his beard is so perfect!!! Did I mention… Wait, what was I talking about? I blinked hard and stood up. “Well Mr Stan, I need to get back.”

He stood up as well and put on his jacket. Ya know, that black leather one? AH DAMNIT!! “C'mon, I’m going that way.”

“You are? For what?”

He chuckled. “Why so curious kitten?”

A huge heat wave went through me. “KITTEN?” 

Sebastian furrowed his brows and drug out slowly, “Curiosity killed the cat?” He nudged me, grinning. “Ms Sinclair, you are blushing something fierce!”

I narrowed my eyes, walking passed him and out the door. “Shut up,” I mumbled. Hearing him behind me, he said, “Always running away.” When he caught up to me, my eyes were wet. Damnitdamnitdamnit!!! Think quick Rachel!

“I’m sorry Sebastian. Brian used to call me that. It threw me off for a second.” I looked down at the sidewalk because if I looked at him I’d kiss him and I really didn’t want to do that. Well, I did, but...oh God. This man drives me insane!!

When I *did* look up, he looked sad. Disappointed almost. “Oh. I’m sorry. Uh, do you mind if I walk with you?”

I laughed awkwardly…and unfortunately a little too loudly. Oh Christ, if I could internally hit myself I’d be beating myself to a pulp! “Sure.”

He smiled. “Okaaaayyyy, thanks.” 

Awkward silence followed. I looked at the other people walking, the store windows…anywhere but him. But then, reality came back. “You know, I’m not sure if I’m going to be much help getting any information for you. And you need to stay away from that…” I scrunched my nose… “little freak and the other one. THAT guy looks pretty evil if you ask me.” 

And here we were. He opened the door and walked in the lobby with me. “Well thanks for meeting me for lunch.” Sebastian’s smile was a small one, but so nice. "Thank you so much Rachel.”

I shook my head and huffed. “For what? I accomplished absolutely nothing for you.”  
Sebastian put his fingers under my chin. “For caring. It means a lot to me.” He leaned down and kissed my cheek. My heart was pounding a mile a minute!

“Can I call you later?”

HELL YEAH YOU CAN! But of course I forgot the English language and just nodded. 

It surprised me how happy he looked. “Great! I’ll talk to you later.” I watched him leave…my brain still trying to comprehend what was happening.

 

I grumbled to myself as I walked into the boardroom. Tony called a staff meeting and nobody knew why…just that he was not happy.

Everyone there had the same expression: curious, worried, and maybe a bit panicked. Peggy, Bruce, and Wanda were sitting across from me chatting about Steve; Sam and Clint…children that they are, figuring THEY could be superheroes if the world was coming to an end.

“Listen. LISTEN!” Sam was practically pouting until he had everyone’s attention. He held out his arms and said, “I have mechanical wings, so I can fly around the city, and then my guns…

I bust out laughing. “I’m sorry Sam, you wanna be a bird that shoots criminals?” My hand hit off the table and I began coughing.

“Aw shut up! Clint wants to shoot arrows that explode! What do you think about THAT missy?!” I stopped laughing and looked at Clint who smiled.

“Hey! That’s a great idea! Birdboy!” I bit my lip, then Clint shoved Sam, calling him Birdboy as well. Poor Sam. 

Meanwhile, Lance was trying to hit on Nat. I rolled my eyes. Really Lance? How stupid are You?

“C'mon baby? Why won’t you go out with me?” His stupid smirk annoyed all the women in the office, yet he thought he was adorable. “Natalia?” She and I looked at each other and I knew she was going to hurt him from the look on her face.

“Not here,” I mouthed. Too late.

She grabbed his arm, twisting it behind his back and pushed his face on the table. He screamed like a little girl. The women in the office loved it, the men snickered. They knew Lance had it coming. Nat got right next to his ear and growled, “Listen here bitch, I’m not going out with you because you’re a lowlife that doesn’t know how to respect a woman.”

Tony walked in the office and without batting an eye, said, “Nat, let him go…Tucker, go sit down, hands to yourself, eyes on me, see Hope after the meeting.”

Lance sat down, rubbing his arm and wincing. I had to stifle a laugh.

“Boys and girls, we have a problem.” He looked at each and every one of us with a stern face. I tensed. Somehow I knew this had to do with Rumlow. 

And it was then that I noticed that he wasn’t here.

 

Tony shuffled his papers, sat back in his chair and dismissed us. “Tucker!”

“I’m goin!” He mumbled something as he walked out the door. Nat looked at Tony and said, “That man is gonna end up in a body cast someday. Why don’t you fire him already?”

“I’m taking care of it Romanoff. Go.” He was not in a good mood, but I didn’t care.

“You have a few minutes Tony?”

He didn’t look up. “Not really, but that’s not gonna stop you, so make it quick.”

“How well do you know Rumlow?”

Tony’s brows bumped together in annoyance. “Well enough to know he’s doing an excellent job. Why?”

I nodded, deciding that I wouldn’t get any help from him at all. “No, never mind, sometimes he seems out of sorts, but I guess he’s not used to Barnes’s office set-up yet.”

“OK then Rachel.” 

I turned on my heel and walked out the door.

 

It was 5:30 when I got home. Rumlow wasn’t in the office for the rest of the afternoon and it was driving me crazy. A private investigator would definitely be a good idea, I thought. 

My cell rang from my purse. I ran for it, embarrassed that I did so. Geez Rachel, get a grip. It was indeed Sebastian.

“Hey, how’s it going?” I asked, hoping I sounded casual.

“Well I know it’s kinda last minute, but do you want grab something to eat?”

I really did, but I also didn’t feel like leaving my apartment. “Eeehhh, I had a pretty rough day. I just might get some takeout.”

There was a pause then, “How about I pick up a pizza and six pack and you can relax.”

I was thrown off. Does he like me? No, of course he doesn't Rachel. This is about his brother. He’s just being nice because I’m helping him. “Um, yeah that sounds good. Thanks.”

“Great! I’ll see you in a bit.” 

Why did he sound so happy to spend time with *me?* I shook my head and went to change. If I had to figure out a man’s brain, I’d be here until kingdom come.

 

And there he was at the door: pizza, beer, and a beautiful smile on that stupid face. 

“Pizza!! May I come in?”

I leaned on the door, tired, but couldn’t help but smiling at this dork. “Well, I guess it’d be rude just to take the stuff and slam the door in your face, so…” I waved my hand as a grand gesture.

As he walked passed me, he huffed then chuckled, “Typical Rachel. I’m beginning to like you.”

“Ohhoho, just *beginning,* Mr Stan,” I said as I shut the door and followed him into the kitchen. “You said you liked me when I punched you, so hmmm, you’ve liked meeeeee for…” I tapped my lips, looking at the ceiling, “for three months now.” 

As soon as those words came out of my mouth, I thought: WHY ARE YOU FLIRTING WITH HIM?!! ARE YOU STUPID?!!

He smirked, grabbed and dipped me. We were nose to nose. “Your right Rachel. I have.” He let me up and turned to my cabinets. “Where are your plates?”

I was motionless and a tiny bit wet. WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED HERE??!!


End file.
